I am not sure if I will post this or if I am just expressing it for a catharsis. I have been in a dark place the last 3 days. I have been battling depression and it hasn’t been pretty. We all deal with dragons or demons in our life that keep us from the full abundant life that God would have for us. One of mine is depression.
There are times when, I get overwhelmed with emotions and it makes me pull back from life and others. I look to ways to medicate the pain I feel with copying techniques and crutches I have used most of my life. One of these for me is food. This of course does not help and in fact brings about its own problems and I am trying to get to a place where I use better ways to work through my pain and darkness.
I use to think of this as spiritual warfare and I guess it still is in a way, just not necessarily hand to hand combat with literal demons. For me, we as christians blame the devil too much and give him too much credit, when in fact a lot of what we deal with is our own ego, wounds and scars that needs to be worked through.
Pain in any form usually denotes something that needs to be confronted and worked through. Most of us would rather not but pain is usually our body telling us we need rest, healing and attention. Doing the work necessary is work and if confronted will pay off. Sometimes we need help and not going it alone. This is an area, I battle with and I guess it is a form of pride.
We are not meant to go it alone. We have God and others around us. Reach out and allow God to use others to support and heal us. This is the real reason for the body of Christ- although it is not always found in the church or in those who claim to be Christian.
I covet your prayers as I work through my pain and wounds. I hope this may help others, who battle the same kind of battles in their life. I think sometimes we try to put a face on our life that looks like we got it all worked out, when we need to share the ugly battles we face to, its part of being real and transparent.
Shining light on our darkness is part of what brings healing and help.